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25 Common short- and long-term relationship problems

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Relationship help for your particular relationship issues

Each entry in the list with common relationship problems on this page has a link to an in-depth article about that particular issue. Each article has a ton of freely available common-sense information, tips and advice for whatever relationship issue is troubling you.

25 Most common relationship problems and issues

Here is the list of the most common short- and long-term relationship problems my clients most often came to see me for.

Follow the link to the page you’re most interested in for help on how to deal with your particular relationship issue.

Would you rather chat with a professional in confidence now? You can connect with a licensed online therapist to get all the support and guidance you need – on any device.

Image quote: Love delights and glorifies in giving, not receiving. -Meher Baba

A close couple relationship – so longed for and yet so often bafflingly difficult to achieve and maintain! Troubled relationship? Help is at hand right here.

What are your relationship problems?
Click on the links to in-depth articles for the best relationship advice, expert help and tips

1. Affairs/infidelity/cheating

See: How to survive infidelity and Signs your partner or spouse is cheating. This includes emotional infidelity, one-night stands, internet relationships (including s(t)exting), long- and short-term affairs and financial infidelity.

2. Problematic physical relationship

Problems in your physical relationship, particularly loss of libido (male¬†and¬†female) and uncertainty about your- or your partner’s gender identity.

3. Significant differences

–¬†in core values and beliefs (see:¬†Relationship compatibility questions).

4. Life stages

– you’ve outgrown each other or have changed significantly for whatever reason

5. Traumatic events

Traumatic and/or life-changing events (see also: Brain injury symptoms).

6. Prolonged stress

Responses to prolonged periods of¬†stress, such as¬†work-related stress, long-term illness, mental health issues,¬†financial problems, problems with the children, infertility… the list could go on!

7. Boredom

Feeling¬†bored in or with your relationship¬†and¬†growing apart (80%)‚ßČ.

8. Jealousy

Dealing Рand coping Рwith a jealous partner and overcoming jealousy yourself.

9. Blended family issues

See:¬†My partner’s children don’t want to know me¬†and¬†Your adult children are rejecting your new partner.

10. Abuse

Domestic violence, which includes verbal as well as physical abuse: THE most serious relationship problem (see:¬†Signs of an abusive relationship,¬†Signs of emotional abuse¬†and¬†How to ‘win’ the silent treatment)
See also:¬†My husband doesn’t find me attractive anymore¬†and How to deal with a narcissistic husband.

11. You shouldn’t have married this person

Knowing you shouldn’t have got married in the first place! (See my relationship or marriage compatibility test).

12. Lack of responsibility from one partner

Рregarding finances, children, health and many other issues (see: Children in the middle).

13. Unrealistic expectations

– still thinking your partner/spouse is the princess or the knight, and not seeing the real human being.

14. Addictions

– substance abuse, gambling,¬†adult content and physically intimate relationships… anything that’s become an unhealthy preoccupation (see:¬†Alcoholism stages¬†and¬†Living with an alcoholic).

'When you love someone, you love the person as they are, and not as you'd like them to be.' -Leo Tolstoy
Remember, you cannot change your partner. You can change your own thoughts and behaviours, however difficult that may be!
15. Excessive reliance on social media

Рto the detriment of the relationship (see: Facebook Problems).

16. Lack of support during difficult times

– from your partner and people that matter to you.

17. Manipulation of, or over-involvement

in your relationship from family and/or friends (learn how and where you get the best relationship advice). Affordable individual, relationship help or marriage counselling Рonline.

18. Lack of communication

about important matters (see: Loving Communication Kit for Couples for help, advice and tips).

19. Poor division of or one-sided lack of responsibility

for chores¬†and tasks. It’s not only women who complain about this relationship problem! (See:¬†Relationship communication¬†for relationship help)

20. Perceived lack of concern, care and consideration/attentiveness

… feeling like the relationship is one-sided is a big one! (see:¬†How to deal with a narcissistic partner¬†or¬†How to ‘make’ your partner fall in love with you again¬†for a ton of relationship help).

21. Significant personal disappointments and traumas

that lead to a change in relationship dynamics (see: Your partner in jail for help).

22. Long-term depression or other mental health issues

suffered by one partner Рor both (see: Treating depression without medication and Signs and symptoms of a nervous breakdown).

23. Significant differences with regards to raising the children

See: How Divorce Affects Children and Children in the Middle for relationship help.

24. Lack of progress in addressing problems

Long-term stress, particularly when not taking responsibility for doing something positive to address the cause, or learning how to deal with it if it can’t be changed (see:¬†Relationship stress).

25. Lack of support during pregnancy

An unsupportive partner during pregnancy and/or significant problems after the birth of your baby, or lack of support with child-rearing (see: How to recover how a  traumatic birth).

Other issues that may lead to a relationship breakdown

In addition to the above relationship problems, here are some further issues that could be seen as potential signs the relationship is over:

How unmet emotional needs lead to relationship issues

A close couple relationship provides an ideal opportunity for many of the essential emotional needs of both partners to be met.

However, relationship problems can occur when one or both of you feel that your needs aren’t being met.

A marriage or partnership can also become troubled if you either misuse or do not maximise your natural resources.

Not taking care of your own emotional needs can lead you to become unhappy and suffer from emotional, mental, social and relationship problems.

For example, as a human being, one of your most important emotional needs is the need for attention. If you feel that you’re not getting enough attention, or if you’re demanding too much of it, then problems may start to arise in your relationship.

Whenever you think people are withholding from you – praise, appreciation, assistance, loving care, and so on – give it to them. You don’t have it? Act as if you have it and it will come. Then, soon after you start giving, you will start receiving. You cannot receive what you don’t give.

Eckhart tolle, A New Earth

Happy couple under a transparent umbrella.
Being happy together takes work, patience, empathy, kindness and a willingness to challenge yourself to become a better you.

Are unrealistic expectations causing your relationship problems?

It’s unrealistic to expect all of your needs to be met in your relationship or marriage.

Being overly dependent on each other often leads to relationship or marriage problems too.

Please note: if you feel that your needs aren’t being met this is a warning sign – not a ‘green light’ for infidelity!

Unrealistic expectations can lead to disappointment and resentment. However your view of precisely what is classed as ‘realistic’ is likely to be different from mine and from your partner’s.

Therein lies the problem as well as the solution.

By looking at your perception of the problems and your reactions, rather than blaming your partner, you’re more likely to make the right decisions about how to overcome the difficulties.

I appreciate you may find this difficult – after all, it could be that your partner has deliberately hurt you.

Obviously, you’re not here to be told that you’ve got to check yourself, and that certainly isn’t my intention. The thing is – you can’t change him or her!

Not found what you’re looking for?

Maybe you haven’t found anything relating to your particular relationship problem in any of the above. In that case, do take a look at the list of related articles below or my sitemap.

I have written many articles on a diverse range of emotional and relationship problems.

I also recommend talking to a licensed therapist. For further information, see my page: Online Relationship Advice.

How to get immediate help from a licensed counsellor

Your problem is never too small or too big, too silly, too embarrassing or too complicated to get personal advice (anonymous if you want) from a licensed therapist. They’ll be happy to help.

  • Click the image below and answer a few questions about yourself and your situation (it takes just a few minutes).
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  • Write down what’s troubling you to start (chat, text, email, video-chat)…
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