You've landed on a page with a new look!
Knowing exactly how to end your relationship (or marriage) can be a real life-saver. Let's face it, the very thought of it ending it can make you cringe. And who do you ask? Your friends are probably no better at it than you.
I'm going to help you out with expert advice and tips on how to walk away from a relationship. By the end of this article you'll know how to prepare for it, how to do it and how not to do it.
Want to know even more? I cover every aspect in more detail in my other articles.
Just in case...
... if you are worried your partner wants to break up with you, hop over to Warning signs of a break-up right now.
You can walk away from a relationship or getting a divorce with confidence and compassion whilst also meeting your own emotional needs. You may even be able to break up amicably.
Think of it as doing away with your all-time favourite jumper. It's been looking tatty for some time, maybe it even has some holes. You chuck it out whilst you remember fondly its long-gone looks and qualities.
When you learn how to end a relationship, you'll discover how the whole process of walking away can be very 'manageable', taking less time, less stress and energy. It's going be less costly - emotionally and financially.
If you have shared assets you need to be sure that you don't end your relationship or marriage before you know exactly where you stand legally and financially. Simply getting that advice early on will help you to feel more confident. You will want to know what your rights are, and what rights your partner has.
I have written a page specifically to help you find the right (divorce) lawyer for you.
Sometimes a relationship or marriage really does need to end. Particularly if you have done all you can to save your marriage or relationship or you are in an abusive relationship you just need to go for it. I realise though that if your particular religion forbids it or shames you for ending, you may really struggle to make that decision.
If by any chance you're still not quite sure that you should walk away, do my relationship test to help you make that decision. You may even discover that there is still much to fight for.
To help you do an ending well I recommend hypnotherapy - it is both effective and very user-friendly. Have a look at my self-hypnosis downloads page and try the download: Ending a relationship.
Watch the video to find out what it could be like. I want you to do better!
I am assuming that you are ending a long-term relationship or marriage and that you will want to do it with care.
When you want to know how to end a relationship, I've got to tell you - you better prepare well for that gut-wrenching conversation. So, here's what you should do...
You may want to brush up on your general communication skills.
Don’t end by leaving a message on an answer machine
Don’t end the relationship during a telephone conversation
Don’t let someone else pass the message on
Don’t suddenly cut off all contact without giving an explanation
Don’t become a pain in the hope that your partner will dump you
Don’t start an affair - infidelity causes a very complicated ending
Don’t be ‘unavailable’ if what you really need to do is end it
Don’t avoid conversations about the state of your relationship
Don’t finish a relationship in a public place, unless you feel unsafe (in an abusive relationship)
Don’t end it just before your partner has a public or social commitment
Don’t tell other people of your intention to end the relationship before your partner knows
Don’t expect an ending without causing any pain
Don’t end in the middle of a row
Don't give an ultimatum
Don’t chicken out of ending, when you really know it is over
I had a client who couldn't understand that his wife wouldn't let him introduce the children to his new girlfriend.
He had left the family home and moved in with his new girlfriend only the day before!
So, you've broken the news. Phew! Now what? Do you stay in touch or not? To some extent it depends on your circumstances.
Now you know how to end a relationship, you'll realise that you may need to stay in touch with your ex (though you can't be friends for a while yet).
This is how long you'll have to stay in touch with your ex...
... for a relatively limited period of time if you have to divide your
... much longer if you have to sell your home and divide assets
... for the rest of your life(!) if you have children
There you have it! You now know how to end a relationship or marriage. There is of course much more to it. Explore my other pages on ending and divorce to make sure you're not going to make it all more difficult on yourself and your partner and children than it already is.
Breaking up is so worth doing well to preserve each other’s dignity and help you both move on after ending a relationship.
There is no shame in needing a bit of help with courage.
Self-hypnosis with an hypnosis download will do the trick. It is discreet, user-friendly and cost-effective.
Have a look at my Hypnosis downloads and FAQ pages (there's a super supportive download about ending a relationship!).
Ending a long-term relationship
Take these effective, but often overlooked steps to avoid a long draw-out process.
How to break up
Expert relationship advice for breaking up your long-term relationship in 3 clear steps.
Warning signs of a break up
13 Warning signs of a break-up, 6 factors that contribute to it and the 12 stages of a break-up.
Ending a long term relationship
How to break up
Divorce advice and counselling
Children in the middle
Divorce tips and advice
Divorce advice for men
Children and divorce
How to choose a lawyer
Causes of divorce
Getting over a relationship
How to deal with rejection
How to do self-hypnosis
Let me know what you're struggling with. I will respond to you right here.
Be sure to write your story in detail.
I can only reply if you give sufficient information for me to have a chance of helping you this way. Please write complete sentences (not in txt/sms style).
Please tell me...
... your first names
... how long you have been together
... how old you both are
... what the problems are
... if you have children and how old they are
... your relationship history
... a little bit about your relationship with your parents