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Problem solving strategies

Problem solving: Part 1, Part 2.

Identify problems in a relationship or at work

Sometimes problems seem to come 'in bunches', and/or a particular problem just feels overwhelming.  I am aiming to walk you through my step-by-step strategies and techniques.  I also have a fabulous decision-making tool for you on the next page.

Identifying the problem

Uncovering essential information as part of your problem solving strategy, will prevent you:

  • solving only part of the problem and find yourself having to deal with the problem again some time later
  • solving the wrong problem
  • misusing your resources or leave vital resources unused
  • becoming absorbed by the problem and too emotional leading to a loss of objectivity

Abstract and over-generalised thinking causes minor issues to appear much larger and significant problems to appear unmanageable.  Being quite specific about what exactly the problems is, will give you a more realistic picture and a better handle on the problem.  You are less likely to feel overwhelmed with my problem solving strategies.

You may also want to amplify your critical thinking with the Improve your critical thinking hypnosis download (via my Hypnotherapy online FAQ page).  Not sure about hypnotherapy?  Read how it works on my page Self hypnosis instruction and online hypnosis.

The only way to solve a problem is to change the thinking that created it."
Albert Einstein (theoretical physicyst, 1879 - 1955)

Dealing with several problems?

The first problem solving strategies is: start with the problem that is quickest to resolve.  However, if you have had to resolve that problem several times - it needs to be analysed to discover its root.  Your problem solving technique has been to yank at the weed, leaving the real trouble spot intact.

Is the issue you are dealing with a 'people problem'?  Do, as part of your problem solving strategy, familiarise yourself with the human givens ( see link further down ) - our innate resources and essential emotional needs.  Taking our human givens into account you and the people around you will thrive much better and problems will be resolved that much easier.

Dealing with a relationship problem?  Not sure whether to go or stay?  The problem solving tool to use for that is: end relationship quiz.

End relationship quiz

Case study of application of my problem solving strategies

The case study below is a very simple example of how a problem seems to have disappeared.  When you are dealing with a 'people problem' your problem solving strategies should include techniques to help calm someone right down.  If you are feeling particularly emotional, then you too will feel much more capable if you calm yourself, before you carry on with your attempts to solve the problem(s).  

I am a school/college counsellor as well as a couple counsellor and work-place counsellor/welfare adviser for one of the emergency services.

My client here was a young person in a college, but could equally have been an adult with a couple relationship problem, or a troubled employee.  The crux of the problem was not the situation itself, but my client's perception of the situation.

Limited thinking - a case study

Jenny was unhappy, hated college,  and decided she was going to change college after her exams.  She did not want to do the all important final two years.  Jenny was the victim of emotional ‘black en white thinking’.

First of all, I spend some time calming her right down.  Only then did I work with her to look at all the factors that 'created' the problem.  I helped her to think clearly by asking the right questions (see steps below).  We explored what exactly was so awful and how often she was exposed to that ‘awfulness’.  I also asked her who and what she liked and valued. 

What was the exact problem?

She disliked two teachers, one of whom she only saw one hour a week.  She found one subject really hard, but had not asked for help.  She had fallen out with a friend, but had already made new friends.

What was the real problem?

The real problem was her perception of the situation.  Once her perception had changed, there simply was no problem.

The outcome

Much to her surprise she found that things were really not so bad at all and she was happy to stay.

Step 1 - gather essential information as part of your problem solving strategy

The real problem may actually be very different than the one you think you have!  Take your time with my problem solving techniques - don't rush the steps.  Don’t worry even if it takes you several days to answer the questions - think of it as a 'project' and a new start.

Make/pour yourself a drink - kick your shoes off and start.

Take a big sheet of paper, draw a circle for each of the contributing factors and write in the details to start off your problem solving strategy.

The time

  • When exactly does the problem occur?
  • When exactly is it at its worst?
  • When does it not occur?
  • Can you you identify a pattern from this information?

The place

  • Where exactly does the problem mostly occur?
  • Where does it not occur?
  • Can you identify a pattern?

The sequence

  • What exactly is happening before the problem occurs?
  • How exactly does the problem start?
  • What is happening for the problem to continue?
  • What exactly was your train of thought?
  • What are you doing/feeling/seeing/hearing?
  • Can you identify a pattern?
Self hypnosis audio from hypnosis downloads.com

Questions about hypnosis? See: Hypnosis online FAQ.

Other people

Friend or foe - how are they detracting or contributing to your problem and problem solving strategies.

  • What significant people are present/absent when the problem occurs?
  • What do others/your partner/friend/colleague/family think about the problem?
  • Who does not know about the problem and should know?
  • What do you anticipate they might they think when they find out?
  • Can one of them act like the 'devil’s advocate' to give you a completely different perspective?
  • Can you identify a pattern fro the information you have gathered?

The one and only - your problem solving strategies

  • What part of the problem is for you to sort out and no-one else?
  • What are your personal weaknesses?
  • Are you able to separate yourself from the problem by giving it colour/name/shape?
  • What part of the problem do you actually have (some) control over?
  • What assumptions did you make when previously trying to sort this problem?
  • Do you need help with the problem?

Your resources and strengths

The most important aspect of any problem solving strategies is looking at your resources for solving the problem(s).

  • What parts of my role as a spouse / colleague, employee or employer/ girl– or boyfriend are working well?
  • What exactly are you doing that makes it work well?
  • What skills/resources do you use in your spare time and at work?
  • What are your achievements? (large ‘one offs’ or every day ‘small’ ones: passing your driving test, getting your PhD or cooking a meal)
  • Who has solved a similar problem? How did they do it?
  • Who can help and/or advice you whilst staying objective?
  • Who can support/encourage you whilst staying objective?
  • What would you consider to be ‘life's little treats’? (i.e. a hot bath, first flowers in spring, looking at art, reading an inspiring book, etc.) - vital to be aware of when you want to recharge your energy!

Beyond the problem

  • What would you be doing/concentrating on if you did not have the problem?
  • How exactly would you and/or the situation be different?
  • What would your friends/family/colleagues notice about your/the situation?
  • What would happen if you just ignored the problem?
  • Could you view the present situation, although clearly not ideal, as an alternative solution?
  • Are there any possible benefits to the situation?
  • Can you make any changes, without having to solve the problem first?
  • How would you ideally like it to end?
  • What small steps can you take towards an eventual solution or part-solution?
  • What can you do today that will make a difference tomorrow?
  • Are there any other opportunities to turn a negative in a positive?
  • What will you settle for if all else fails?

Fine-tune your relationship and lift your spirits!

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You may also be interested in:


The human givens
Natural depression treatments
Dealing with criticism
Anger management tips
Breaking up tips
Facebook problems
Managing stress in the workplace



Other helpful links:

The six types of Socratic Questions
Psychological Science - Embodies metaphors and creative 'acts'

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