How often have you heard it said? "You make your own luck." Is that really true? If it is, how do you do that? What’s the secret?
Maybe you’re acutely aware of other people's luck and your (perceived) lack of it. Perhaps you searched 'how to get lucky' because you’re feeling down or even depressed.
Well, I’m glad you’ve landed here, because I’m hoping to help you on your way a bit.
Oh... by the way, if you landed here because you're hoping to 'get lucky' as in have sex, then first learn the Secrets to a Happy Relationship!
The first question to ask really is: why would you want to be lucky? Would it make you more successful? Would it prevent heartache, or hard work? Would it even make you happier?
You only need to read the headlines to realise that success does not necessarily make you happier, though it may contribute to your happiness. Words like 'success' and 'happiness' are nominalisations. They're letters in a line that form symbols for something that only you can define. Words like these have a different meaning for each one of us.
Maybe you feel you 'deserve' a bit of luck. I wonder, then, what rules and parameters you use to come to that conclusion. When, where and how does anyone become 'entitled' to some good fortune?
At the time of completing this article I was listening to the audio version of Viktor Frankl's book, 'Man's Search for Meaning', which had long been on my wish list...
How lucky would you feel with a few peas scraped from the bottom of the pan? It illustrates just how relative luck really is.
What if your environment gives you little access to resources that could nudge your chances of luck in the right direction? You might, for example, expect that a decent education would increase your chances.
What if you grew up in dysfunctional household? That could have damaged your Innate Resources - the very developmental templates that were meant to help you become successful in life. So many people who grew up in an unsafe environment often feel like they’re forever trying to catch up.
Yet amongst them too are those who shine like stars and transcend their early exposure to a less than desirable environment. Maybe they even shine because of it.
What about Nick Vujicic - born without arms and legs? How 'lucky' is he? You decide:
Of course, I interpret what I see through western eyes. Luck may just mean different things in different cultures.
Lucky people: those people who seem to sail through life - whatever it brings - and receive seemingly extraordinary offers. But they're unlikely to have had a magic bullet, nor a magic wand. There doesn’t even necessarily appear to be anything particularly outstanding about them. They just seem happy and resourceful most of the time - regardless of their circumstances.
It’s ultimately your perception that makes you lucky or not. The messages that you give yourself make the difference... so it may be those messages you need to change.
If you were to know a little bit more about those people you considered lucky, you might decide that they could perhaps actually be very unlucky. What seems to you the ultimate reward may for them have meant the loss of something else. For example: someone running a successful business, with a fantastic income, may well have lost the love of his or her life in the process of building that business.
The difference is that people who consider themselves to be lucky are most likely running a different sort of spiel in their mind.
There’s not a huge amount you can do that will immediately help you to become lucky.
However, my 20 tips on how to become lucky will, I hope, nudge you in the right direction. In addition, following my advice can potentially boost your confidence, lift your self-esteem, improve your relationships and help you deal with depression.
I also recommend you try self-hypnosis with the help of a download. See my page: Hypnosis FAQ and Downloads for further information.
As fast as each opportunity presents itself, use it! No matter how tiny an opportunity it may be - use it."
Robert Collier, success author 1885 - 1950
The Roman goddess of fortune - and fate - Fortuna (Tyche in Greek mythology) represented good as well as bad luck. Invite Lady Luck’s pleasure by living your life in a way you’d be happy to share with anyone, regardless of role or rank.
My top tips for encouraging Lady Luck's goodwill will also help you to avoid feeling downtrodden by the inevitable string of bad luck. You’re less likely to turn it into your 'just deserts’, as you’ll instead be living your life with purpose.
Just make sure that being the nice guy doesn’t mean you become a doormat...
If you feel that you're one of those people who only attracts bad luck and that you’re the unluckiest person on the block, you may benefit from some help to turn things around.
It could be that you’ve developed a memory bias for all things 'unlucky'. Perhaps you’re filtering out everything that's positive in your life. Maybe you’re even depressed. If so, counselling can really make a difference by helping you reassess your life.
Since this is a relationship advice site I want to be sure that I address any relationship issues. So here goes...
You’re a team - create some luck together! Instead of focusing on each other's shortcomings or your own, learn to harness your collective strengths. What can you learn from each other? How can you build on those strengths? A MUCH better use of energy than envy and jealousy!
If you're worried about the health of your relationship, see How to Save Your Marriage or Relationship.
I'm sure you already knew (even if only deep down) that there's no magic spell for how to get lucky. But, there is much you can do to create and make use of opportunities that can bring positive benefits to your life. And perhaps if you look at things from a different perspective, you'll discover there's already luck in your life that you hadn't quite noticed yet!
What kind of opportunities would you love most right now? Spend a little time thinking about what you're hoping for... then seize the day! Help it (whatever 'it' is to you) on its way by opening as many doors for it as you can :-)