How to get over someone fast

Part 1, Part 2

You just want to know how to get over someone - as fast as possible. I understand!

I'm not here to judge, so for me it doesn't matter if the object of your affection or 'infatuation' is an ex-partner or spouse, a lover or someone you couldn't have. For all, there are overlapping feelings (as well as feelings and reactions specific to you in your particular circumstances).

If only you could forget he or she ever existed, because... oh the pain, the pain! Not being able to be with him or her can be 'hell' and concentrating on anything else or just enjoying yourself is so hard.

It could be that you're still part of that person's life one way or another. You may be...

... working with him or her
... seeing or meeting them every day
... bumping into them in the gym, club, or at regular meetings
... parenting your children together

He or she may be...

... your ex (read this page on how to get over a relationship too!)
... part of your friendship group
... a professional you're consulting
... someone you're having an affair with
... a business partner

Feeling rejected and heartbroken, miserable and 'not yourself'. This little dog knows all about it!Sooo not feeling yourself?

Whatever the circumstances - you wish you could get them out of your mind, even if you're desperately wishing they could be part of your life! It's like they're permanently camping inside your head.

If you were actually in a relationship with that person, you may or may not have had an inkling that it was going to end. If it was a shock, I'm quite sure you feel stunned and massively rejected. Maybe you feel you could just stay in bed and weep all day, wishing you could just switch off and forget!

You may be torturing yourself with thoughts about who he or she is with. Do you know them? Is he or she better looking? Are they better in bed? More intelligent? And so on...

(By the way, don't forget to read Part 2 of this article too; it has a video in which Prof Helen Fisher explains what happens in your brain when you're in love.)

Broken, torn heart.Oh, the pain, the pain of a broken heart! If only it was easy to forget someone you love. Fear not - help is at hand!

The hidden pain of unrequited love or infatuation

Maybe you never actually had a relationship with that person, but you so wish you had.

Maybe there's a good reason you can never have a relationship with him or her, because they...
... have rejected you
... are too young
... are not culturally compatible
... have the 'wrong' religion
... are married or spoken for in any other way

However painful and difficult, it's such a normal feeling! You are not 'off your rocker' at all.  Watch the video in part 2 for an explanation and stick with me - I am going to be right here for you!

Fast relief!

Download the 'How to Get over a Relationship' hypnosis MP3 or 'Unrequited Love'. You'll find them on on my page Hypnosis FAQ and downloads.

Picture quote: Your mission: Be so busy loving your life you have no time for hate, regret or fear. Karen SalmonsohnActively fill your life with positive experiencing so that you'll have less time or energy for worrying

Symptoms of unrequited love or a crush

Realising that you have recognisable symptoms can help. You won't feel so alone in your desperate search for effective ways to get someone out of your head.

So, have a look at my list of signs and symptoms of either unrequited love or a massive crush (or indeed the start of a beautiful relationship!)

10 signs that you're completely infatuated

  1. You go to bed imagining that person right beside you
  2. You imagine making love to that person, perhaps even whilst making love to someone else
  3. You dream about that person and wake up thinking about him/her
  4. You think of any which way you can to be in touch
  5. You think of all the excuses you can to contact that person for 'legitimate' reasons
  6. You find yourself making a detour in the hope that you bump into him or her
  7. You go over every single word they have spoken or written to identify the 'hidden' meaning
  8. You desperately try to interpret every touch, every look
  9. You constantly check your emails, mobile, Facebook - whatever
  10. You hit the gym, update your wardrobe, skimp on meals to lose that extra fat

I could go on of course - so many of my clients have told me all of those things and more... and in fact, I know them only too well myself! How many mirror your experience?

Still a chance to mend your broken relationship?

It may be too late, but if there's still a glimmer of hope have a look at my page on how to create the best chance of getting back together. There may still be a chance to mend your broken relationship.

If there is no time to waste, speak to a qualified online counsellor now. You can connect with an expert for free for 7 days (yes, really!)

Are you making it even more difficult for yourself to get over him or her than necessary?

First of all, know that being emotional costs loads of energy. You may well be tempted to spend your time thinking about the lost love, nurturing every thought about him or her. Perhaps you're even devising imaginary (or real) plans to rekindle the love that never was, or that's now considered dead by the other person. However, that all adds to the emotional overload you're already dealing with.

Just stopping thinking about the love that never was, or your ex, isn't going to work either.

Therefore I encourage you to ensure that you nurture your body and mind to help you divert your attention and feel strong in the face of that temptation.

In part 2 I'll give you a tonne of tried and tested ideas and advice to help you move on from someone you love.

One empty, chair instead of two, at the edge of a lakeIt will take time to learn to be on your own again and enjoy it. Be kind to- and patient with- yourself. And don't let anyone tell you when you should be over it!

Professional relationship advice to help you get over your loss
Which strategies will you use?

Choose one or two things from the list of strategies in Part 2 and commit to them. Today is the first day of the rest of your life - it's time to move on! 

Join me in Part 2 for my top tips and best relationship advice on How to Get Over Someone... where you'll find:

  • A video about your brain in love
  • A free Letting Go worksheet
  • 10 effective strategies to help you get over someone
  • A slideshow with 7 things that help and 7 things that will impede your recovery
  • 6 ways to help you focus on the future
  • A free PDF download of the whole article

Part 1, Part 2

Related Articles

Getting Over a Breakup and Forget?
Broken Heart Syndrome

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Elly Prior

Hello you! :-)

It's me - Elly Prior, I'm the Founder and Author of this site. I'm a 'real' person! I'm hoping to make a positive difference, small or large, to every person who visits my site.

I suspect you may be looking for help. There are counsellors waiting to help you right now. So, do connect with an expert counsellor now and be as thorough as you like about what's troubling you.

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