Facebook and your relationship

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

This is the third part of a series about Facebook and your relationship. If you've landed here first, do be sure to start off with Page 1.

The state of your relationship or marriage

All these problems, except for the latter, signify a serious issue in your relationship. I'm afraid you might as well forget about it just being one of your Facebook problems. You're right to be concerned.

However, if you've only just found out then you'll need time to recover from the shock. Depending on the seriousness of the relationship you may feel you have just been dealt blow to the body.

Give yourself a few days at least to calm down. Then consider how you're going to challenge your partner. As human beings we have much more clarity of thought when we are calm. So, here is my advice:

  • don’t jump to conclusions
  • don’t start a row
  • don’t plot revenge
  • don’t start a very undignified and public ‘tit for tat’ campaign
  • don’t tell everyone you're going to end the relationship, because when everything's calmed down, you may not want to end it at all

There's much you can do about rescuing your relationship - even if you can't persuade your partner that it needs some work! You didn't start this relationship or get married with a view to just giving up, I'm sure.  I'd therefore suggest: Save My Marriage/Relationship for help on getting things back on track again.

Best case scenario

Emotions often override logical thought.  Your partner may have posted in anger in the heat of the moment, without thinking about the consequences.  

As human beings we're prone to doing stupid things and overreacting when we're very emotional. That may have been the case for your partner and he or she may actually regret it.  

Be aware, though, if this kind of 'slip' is part of a general pattern and not just a one-time Facebook problem. You may need to consider whether he or she is the right person for you.

What about you? You may now realise that you have a problem, that perhaps you have a tendency to overreact.  If you are prone to 'red misting' - hop over to my page on Anger Management Tips.

Has your account been hacked?

Search engines receive hundred of queries from people wanting to hack into someone’s Facebook account on a daily basis!  

Are you absolutely sure that what's been posted is truly the work of your partner? Could some other issue be the cause of your Facebook problem? Even this site has had visitors who landed here after querying how they could cause trouble on Facebook!

Facebook: Love

What you should be doing next

This is not the right time to start thinking about splitting up or divorcing your partner, unless this really is the last straw.  

So I'd love you to try the following:

Facebook problems again may be a reflection of what is happening ‘for real’ in your life. You deserve better!

We haven't even discussed the really worrying problems!

Next, have a look at my article on Facebook - Fears and Suspicions

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

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