Ways to manage stress
How you manage stress is dependent on several factors, including...
- the type of stress you're facing
- your nature
- to some extent your genes
- your overall well-being at the time
- the support you have around you
- the intensity and duration of the stress you're experiencing
Ultimately what really matters is your response to the things that stress you out and the way you manage stress. You may not always have control over a 'stressor' - however, you do have control over how you deal with whatever happens to you.
This page is one of a series of articles on stress. My advice covers relationship stress, divorce, work-related stress and financial stress. When you think about it, you'll realise that most of the stresses in your life (though not all) will in some way be connected to the relationships you have with other people. These include your partner, other loved-ones, your colleagues, managers and/or friends.
What do I know?
I was a work-place and relationship/couple counsellor with over 24 years' experience. I know what causes people to seek help with stress, and I'm confident that I can give you effective ways to manage it.
I've listed the top stressors from my point of view, based on the help my clients have asked for over the years. I so hope these will help you to feel less alone and also that you might feel encouraged to seek help, should you need it. So, here goes - a long list of types of stresses.
Couple Relationship Problems come in all shapes and sizes. From my experience, it's likely that your personal relationship(s) will cause you the most stress.
Here are the most common stressors in a relationship, with links to pages where you'll discover ways to manage those particular problems and stresses...
10 Common relationship issues and stresses
- Lack of attention: You don't feel that your partner cares to listen to you anymore or wants to spend time with you
- Being taken for granted: Things you do go unnoticed and are unappreciated
- Lack of understanding: You or your actions are often misinterpreted - this can be very stressful (read my advice on this particular Relationship Problem)
- Infidelity: One or the other, or both? A complete lack of trust is a top stressor (see Surviving Infidelity)
- Spending: Your values and beliefs clash and you don't agree. Financial hardship is very stressful (see Your Relationship and Financial Advice)
- Substance abuse: Your partner is 'not the same person' you married when they're abusing drugs or alcohol (see Alcoholism Stages)
- Parenting: Your values and beliefs are different; one of you is more understanding/permissive or more strict than the other
- Complaining: You feel you're never good enough, every conversation contains a moan (See How to Deal With Criticism)
- Not consulting: When it comes to major or minor decisions, your partner does things their way without talking to you first
- Family and friends: Your partner has a problem with yours, or perhaps you don't get along with theirs either
For the full list of 25 common relationship problems, click here.
If you recognise any of the above top stressors in your relationship, don't despair! There are ways to manage stress, and to restore the balance to your life. Here are a just a few ideas...
9 Ways to manage stress in your relationship
- Go for Relationship/Couple Counselling to get the best relationship advice - it'll be tailored to your own personal situation and needs
- Learn to communicate better with each other - see my page on Relationship Questions and Answers
- Inject some fun and romance back into your relationship. If you're bored, try Breaking the Routine. There's nothing quite as stressful as being bored. You can manage the stress levels in your relationship by simply putting more energy into improving it in a positive way rather than constantly finding fault with each other
- Practice meditation - when you're calm, you're so much less likely to overreact and jump down your partner's throat. It'll also help you to see things in a wider perspective. It can stop the endless highs and lows of those dreadful mood-swings you may be experiencing. Of course that's going to have a beneficial effect on you and your relationship or marriage. Meditation really is one of the very best way to manage stress.
- Visit my page on Relationship Stress to get more advice on ways to manage stress
- Use the 'remote' help of a relationship expert. Have a look at: Save The Marriage/Relationship by Lee Baucom, PhD
- Talk to a relationship expert right now to get an independent professional help you sort it all out
- Take responsibility for your own feelings and manage your own stresses. Visit my page on how to relief stress.
- Sign up for the free video course on insecurity in relationships.
You can pick and choose any from the above list that appeal to you, and that suit your circumstances and lifestyle. I promise you, with a little effort, you can find ways to manage stress and overcome your relationship issues.
Hop over to Part 2 to find out about the other major causes of stress in life...
How to Deal with Rejection
Treatments for Insomnia
Problem Solving Strategies
Children in the Middle
Pregnant and Partner Unsupportive
Your Partner's Children Are Hostile
Other Helpful Links
Stressed parents 'make kids ill' - BBC news
Problems? Don't know what to do?
Feeling desperate, stressed or depressed?
It's really easy for you to get your own online counsellor...
- ... BetterHelp will match you with the right counsellor
- You can contact your counsellor for FREE for a week as often as you want and get quality professional attention and support.
- Fill in the online questionnaire to ensure a successful match - it takes about 10 minutes (Yes, I know - you may find it little tedious when you're keen to get started, but it's essential!)
- To start your free week-long subscription -
enter your credit card details (it's safe and secure).
Don't need help beyond your first week?
Simply cancel your subscription - that's absolutely fine!
- If you can afford it -
give yourself a chance to deal with stuff once and for all and carry on beyond the week. You won't believe what a breath of fresh air it is to have someone on and by your side.
- Not sure if it's really right for you?
For further information hop over to my page on online (relationship) advice.
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It's me - Elly Prior, I'm the Founder and Author of this site. I'm a 'real' person! I'm hoping to make a positive difference, small or large, to every person who visits my site.
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