About Elly

Hello!

Perhaps you want to know a little more about me because you are considering contacting me for counselling, coaching or training. You may have landed here out of plain curiosity of course!

The 'temporary' move

I am Dutch - I came to the UK about 30+ years ago with plans to stay for a year! In The Netherlands I was a Pharmacy Technician and a Doctor's Assistant. Neither of those roles were compatible with training/jobs in the UK. I found a job in Kent as a Trainee Operating Department Technician in a local hospital. By the time I left - 4 years later - I was a Senior ODA in charge of two anaesthetic rooms.

A change of career

Whilst bringing up my son I trained with Relate Marriage Guidance (the number one agency for couple counselling in the UK) as a couple counsellor. I stayed with Relate for 11 years. I served on the executive committee, interviewed prospective counsellors and mentored new couple counsellors. I loved couple counselling and I still do!

I started my private practice in 1993 - super flexible. Working from home enable me to be around for my son.

Couple counselling requires significant additional skills. Done well, it really is much more effective then working with one of the partners when presented with a relationship problem. Equally if only one partner arrives for relationship counselling, a well-trained and experienced counsellor can, in my opinion, help that person much better than a counsellor who has only been trained to do one-to-one work.

I love to see people make shifts whereby they begin to understand their partner and themselves in a more helpful way. It is very rewarding to see them move from struggling with all sorts, to learning new skills, acquire new knowledge and awareness and turn their relationship around. I also support couples who decide they can no longer be together. A 'good' ending makes all the difference to how well you recover.

Further training and the human givens

Increasingly I felt I needed and wanted to learn more about problems such as depression, anxiety, trauma and anger. About 9 years ago I came across the human givens approach. It felt as if I had come home - so much of the approach made sense intuitively. I gained the HG postgraduate diploma two years later.

In 2008 I added EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) to my toolbox, to give me further choices in helping people with all kinds of problems, but particularly with trauma.

What about your particular essential needs?

I am always curious about what exactly contributes to people's overall well-being. So, when you come to me, don't be surprised by my enquiring about aspects of your well-being you may yourself not have considered as being particularly important!

Experience

I am very fortunate to have gained experience in a variety of settings over the years. At present I work for Kent emergency services as a Welfare Adviser and Workplace Counsellor. My role there includes leading the Trauma Risk Management (TRiM) programme.

I have been in private practice since 1993. My practice includes work as an external counsellor for Dover Counselling Center. The Center is a charitable organisation that grew out of the Herald Assistance Unit (HAU), a service set up by Kent County Council in 1987, following the capsize of the Herald of Free Enterprise ferry.

I work as a school counsellor in a girls' grammar school. I absolutely love working with the girls and feel very privileged that they entrust me with so many of their very private concerns and challenges. I often admire their fortitude, stickability, search for understanding and their willingness to make the necessary changes.

Coaching

I now offer coaching too. I have found that sometimes counselling is just not appropriate or not acceptable to people who feel stuck - for a variety of reasons.

With my background as a counsellor I can effectively identify how you may have got 'stuck', by asking the right questions. That helps in identifying what you want out of life and supporting, encouraging and challenging you on the road to achieving your goals. Before you know, with the help of coaching, you are moving on to better things.

Training/workshops I currently provide

I offer ‘Working with couples’ for counsellors and health professionals, as well as several other workshops. Please see my contact page for further details.

Accreditation

I am a HGI and BACP Accredited Counsellor

This website

I am fortunate to have found an amazing programme to build my website I had many false starts with either dodgy companies selling useless programmes for my needs, or good companies with unsuitable programmes.

I plan to return to The Netherlands in the next couple of years and I know that the income from this site won't be a bit affected by my move. This is hugely reassuring - I can therefore take the time to settle into work on the other side of the North Sea.

Who knows ... I may only need a job for a couple of days by then ... if at all.

Find out how I can help you and contact me
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